Well it has been a long time since I wrote but that last chemo just about killed me. It was 5 hours long total and then the next day I had to go for a shot which they said would make my joints ache. Ache they did and then some, everywhere, I could barely walk and get out of bed and I took pain pills, half of what they per scribed and that constipated me for 4 days. I really thought I was on my last days. I am still not feeling well and it has now been two and a half weeks and I am suppose to go through this again next Monday. I have had to go the last two Monday's and get my blood drawn and my counts keep going down but they don't seem to be to concerned. I have a cough that makes me feel like I have smoked a pack of cigs a day, and I am not smoking! I told the nurse all of this yesterday about how I was feeling and she said if it got any worse to let them know. I DO NOT WANT TO DO MY LAST TREATMENT!!!!!!!! I am so burned and tired and achy and bald, my hair follicles hurt all over my head, I am having trouble eating and I am losing weight, things are getting so loose on me. I sleep for two hours and then up to the bathroom, drink lots of water and back to sleep for two hours. I want this all to end. I want to know that somethings good has happened from all this, I want to see some test results!!!
Well, I guess I will just have to wait until next Monday and see what the Dr. says. Thanks for all the well wishes and thoughts and prayers. Until next time......
Lots of people will say "take it day by day", but I think in your case, you should just go hour by hour. Each one passed is a step in the right direction. Yeah, maybe easy for me to say, but another hour of living is another hour of precious life. The chemo is a hellish way to ultimately get better, but if that's what is takes, then I guess you just push through it all. Hopefully, the Dr will give answers or comforting words before the next round. Anyway, "hang in there"...hour by hour, minute by minute.
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